BEFORE my grandmother passed away this
fall, before she stopped painting flowers and taking photographs, before her
final trip to the ballet, before she made her last batch of sweet, sticky
schnecken, before she could no longer eat anything but fudgesicles, before she
was forced to sleep for much of the day and could no longer entertain
visitors, she took me into the sunroom of her house in Kansas City early one
morning.
"Go into the kitchen cupboard,
the one below the China," she said, "Get the cookbooks. We'll sort through
them, you'll choose the ones you want."
Her voice was fuzzed by the oxygen tube that was strapped to her nose.
It was just the two of us, alone, the
sun speckling in through the screen doors and the humid heat of a Kansas City morning in August. My siblings were sleeping, my father running errands, my mother
was on the telephone with doctors, always more doctors. My grandfather was in
the kitchen in his Joseph A Bank suit eating Grapenuts and Cheerios mixed
together in a blue-rimmed ceramic bowl. My grandmother's arms were skeletal
beneath her pink blouse, but otherwise much remained the same. The cockoo clock
ticked. The light puddled on the two lacquered card tables on her sun porch.
Through the windows, Eric, the gardener, pruned my grandmother's roses, her delphinia, her dahlias and daisies.
The cupboard contained a chaos of
cookbooks, lined, stacked, piled, crammed into corners. Her favorites stood in the front row – a 1932
edition of Thoughts for Food from
which she often prepared a gelatinous Thousand Island Crab Ring Mold, multiple
volumes of The Barefoot Contessa, a
Spanish tapas book written by one of her friends, The Silver Palate Cookbook. Crammed behind these, other volumes had
been gathering dust since before I was born. A Cuisinart cookbook published in
the 1980s was virtually untouched. A midcentury Guide to Napkin Folding – good as new.
We began sorting through her collection,
spreading the books out on one of the lacquered card tables, considering them as one might bottles in a wine cellar.
Of her three children and seven grandchildren, I was the only one who had pursued food professionally – the only one who asked, every time upon arriving
in Kansas City, when we would be making the deviled eggs. When I was growing
up, she would often pull out an old cookbook, read me the notes that her own mother
had made in the margin, and reminisce.
“How I used to love pickled tongue,
Willie. Pickled tongue on toast. It was divine, Willie. Really divine.”
That August morning, however her eyes
flitted from cover to cover like so many photographs in an old family album.
“Well, you know what to do,” she said.
“Make a pile. Whatever you want is yours.”
Some selections were obvious. She
placed the cookbooks that she’d read to me, the ones that had already been
passed down for two or three generations, into my hands. The 19th century Art of Cookery I’d once found in a box in a closet in her guest room. The Settlement Cookbook with a four leaf clover tucked inside. The
duct-taped copy of Thoughts for Food from
which she had cooked until her cancer made the smell of savory food unbearable to
her but which had also granted her a life's wish: to eat ice cream always and only and
without hesitation.
Beard
on Bread, a well-worn copy of the 1973 classic with a sketching of Beard on
the cover, big and proud, rolling out dough, caught my eye. I flipped through
it -- Saffron Bread, Potato Bread with Caraway Seeds, Myrtle Allen’s Brown
Bread. I placed it in the TAKE HOME pile. She handed me Italian Bouquet: An Epicurean Tour of Italy, a heavy 1968 volume
published by Gourmet. TAKE HOME. The
Congressional Club Cook Book. TAKE HOME. Better Homes and Gardens Famous Foods from Famous Places, in all
its 1960s glory. TAKE HOME.
There were community cookbooks too, spiral-bound
collections from the country club, from local schools, a holiday cookbook from
the women’s society. A thin, stapled
booklet with a drawing of a forlorn looking poodle printed on the cover called
to me: 120 Best Recipes Compiled for the
Benefit of the Las Vegas Humane Society. It looked like a Brooklyn 'zine,
but was an early-century recipe booklet
that my grandmother’s great aunt (my great-great-great-aunt) had put together
from her ranch in Las Vegas, New Mexico. It was a dessert-heavy collection: Cherry
Sponge Pie, Fabulous Chocolate Cake, Oatmeal Crispies No. 1 and No. 2, Snow
Pudding. TAKE HOME.
NOW I am home in my Brooklyn pad.
There are no flowers outside. I line the windowsill with plants from the local
garden shop. I have a miniature desk and a stout bookshelf from Ikea that
houses some of the cookbooks that, beginning in fifth grade, I used to teach
myself how to cook: Roast Chicken and Other Stories by Simon
Hopkinson and Rose Levy Baum’s The Bread
Bible, Thoughts for Food and, of course, the poodle booklet from my
grandmother.
It was cookbooks, in great part, that taught me how to cook. The ten-pound cooking textbook that my
oral hygienist gave me when I was in sixth grade provided me a solid culinary
education. It taught me how to respond to ingredients. And then I learned, by
trial and error and doing things over and over again. The fullness of the
kitchen can never be realized through ingredient lists and numbered steps
alone. But cookbooks have an important place in my life.
I’m 22 now, and in my first home that I must create on my own, I cook by
touch and taste and whim. Once in a while, I use a recipe -- it's like having an
old friend to dinner. Sometimes there are recipes so inspiring that I must try them.
And maybe, the cookbooks I've collected and the new ones I can't resist buying are, or will someday be, a record of my own life, as certainly as my grandmother’s were of hers.
And maybe, the cookbooks I've collected and the new ones I can't resist buying are, or will someday be, a record of my own life, as certainly as my grandmother’s were of hers.
This is really lovely, Will.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, Will.
ReplyDeleteLove the new blog and the name and logo. This essay spoke so beautifully to who Joan was and how you are carrying a piece of her forward. Bravo!
ReplyDeleteWe are in southern India- talk about food with spices galore!
Will, This is such a wonderful piece --I love the way you write! Even if I did not know Joan, I would have gained such an insight from your descriptions. You ignited memories of all the cookbooks I have from my dad, the chef, who would used calendar books to write his own recipes and not for "dentist 9:30":) For example, Feb 17 may be a Seafood Casserole. I know would smile and appreciate his collection..some day when you are in Belmont I look forward to showing them to you.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the blog,
I don't know you, and, to be honest, I've no idea how I stumbled upon your blog. Just lost in the internet as can happen sometimes on Saturday afternoons. Anyway, I felt compelled to let you know this post touched me and actually brought tears to my eyes. As a professional writer, I'm usually highly critical of other people's writing, but you have a gift. Stick with it.
ReplyDeletenike nfl jerseys
ReplyDeletelouis vuitton handbags
toms outlet
louis vuitton outlet
coach outlet store online clearances
moncler jackets
coach outlet
canada goose outlet
chicago bulls jerseys
michael kors outlet
toms shoes sale
michael kors handbags
ray-ban sunglasses
coach outlet store online
adidas yeezy
cheap rolex watches
canada goose
coach outlet
adidas uk
oakley sunglasses outlet
ralph lauren polo outlet
giuseppe zanotti sneakers
ugg uk
christian louboutin sale
canada goose coat
ugg boots
ugg slippers
ugg boots
ugg australia
ray ban sunglasses uk
canada goose pas cher
christian louboutin shoes
toms outlet
ray ban sunglasses outlet
michael kors outlet
cheap uggs
ralph lauren
rolex watches
nfl jerseys wholesale
mont blanc
chenlina20160902
Thank you for sharing the information
ReplyDeleteInovasi Terbaru Walatra Gamat Emas
Obat Untuk Menyembuhkan Fraktur/Patah Tulang
Pengobatan Untuk Sembuhkan Abses Kulit
Cara Mengobati Susah Buang Air Kecil (Susah Kencing)
Cara Mengobati TBC Tulang
Obat Untuk Mengatasi ISPA (Infeksi Saluran Pernapasan Akut)
There are times when I find it difficult to make decisions, but still have to do. I know people always have emotions so that there is no justice. But I still hope.
ReplyDeletewww.facebookbaixargratis.com.br
canada goose outlet
ReplyDeletepolo outlet
canada goose
supreme clothing
uggs outlet
ray ban sunglasses
jordan shoes
pandora jewelry
salvatore ferragamo shoes
nmd adidas
1.01linpingping
I generally want to peruse the quality substance and this thing I found in you post.
ReplyDeleteobat kaki bengkak
obat jantung bengkak
obat leukosit tinggi
obat batuk berdarah
obat perut begah
obat benjolan di kepala
Interesting post. I Have Been wondering about this issue, so thanks for posting. Pretty cool post.It 's really very nice and Useful post.Thanks
ReplyDeleteobat batuk berdarah
Thanks for every other informative site. The place else may just I get that kind of information written in such an ideal means? I have a venture that I’m just now operating on. and I have been on the look out for such information.
ReplyDeleteobat anyang anyangan
obat ginjal bocor
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletea given article is very interesting and very useful for my admin thank you very much and sorry for my permission to share the article here :
ReplyDeleteObat jantung bengkak herbal
Obat herbal penebalan dinding rahim
Cara mengatasi kepikunan
given article is very helpful and very useful for my admin, and pardon me permission to share articles here hopefully helped :
ReplyDeletePengobatan alternatif green world
Solusi cantik alami
Obat infeksi saluran kencing
Obat pengapuran tulang
Obat hipertiroid
Obat flu tulang
Nurhasanah herbal
Thanks for sharing so signification article with us. I agree with your idea completely.I am looking forward to another great article from you
ReplyDeleteobat keloid
obat ginjal bengkak
obat thalasemia
obat benjolan di kepala
obat benjolan di payudara